Since I have no history on Amigo and do not know what his experiences have been, I must pay attention to what he tells me with compassion for his fears and responses, which are based on his prey instincts and experience. Our future rests on our ability to work through his fears and concerns with patience, compassion, and firm, forward, composed leadership.
For example, I have chosen to invite Amigo to me rather than catching him. This means there are days when he simply does not come to me because he does not want to, and I honor his wishes. While some might say I am “letting him off the hook” and teaching him not to respect me as his leader, this helps me work on my goal to have a leadership style that inspires, attracts followership, and shows confidence combined with respect for my team’s needs and wishes.
Frequently Amigo’s choice has to do with what we did the last time we worked together, so I am incentivized to make every session valuable, end every interaction of ours on a positive note, and not do too much physical work that makes him tired or sore.
The minute we establish a timeline, or even a goal we are in a hurry to meet with a horse, we force our timeline and will on a soul who has no concept of time, and whose survival instincts as a prey animal are to not proceed until they are sure they are safe and confident. The best thing we can do to facilitate our relationship is meet them where they are and not rush. This is great practice for "human" leadership!
Safety and confidence are the foundation of whole leadership--leading with clarity, connection, and courage. The journey truely is the reward.
How do you build safety and confidence with your team?
